CHOICE
IS YOURS
Limiting
desires rather than fulfilling them leads to happiness and salvation
- Gautama Buddha
For the last 23 years, 26th August is special and memorable to us. It is the birthday of my two daughters- Pratyusha and Anusha. Though born two years apart on the same day in 1992 and 1994, they also look similar. Many people wonder whether they are twins. We enjoy celebrating their birthday on that day. But for the last seven years, either one of them, or sometimes both of them are not with us as they are studying or working away from home.
But I am really pained to hear questions from some people whether it was planned to have their birthdays on the same day and any surgery was carried out so that the birthday remains the same. I really thank Dr. Srimathi of Hyderabad, not to yield to our pressure. Our pressure was not for the birthday sake, but we were unable to see the pains suffered by my wife for more than 36 hours. But the very experienced doctor was confident and ruthless that delivery would be normal and in that condition she never performs surgery. This brings into my mind a lot of questions.
I am proud of India, not because it has ancient culture, vedas are born here and lot of epics and religions has roots here,but because it is the largest democracy in the world. It had proved many skeptics wrong by remaining a democratic country even with its wide diversity, illiteracy and poverty. Amartya Sen-Nobel Laurette writes in his book-Arguementative Indian that democracy is not new to India.Here is a country where Caravaka's athiest arguments also were respected and from this country Buddha's highlighting of good behaviour rather than good prayer were spread across the world. No Galileo was ever killed in this country for proposing a theory against the then existing beliefs and practices. So freedom and choice were enjoyed by Indians from time immemorial.
However, is it right to have your own choice all the time? Especially opting for surgery for some mere enjoyment of same birthday, for the children or to have a baby born on an auspicious day or for a better horoscope. While I was working at Ramagundam, I came to know that Karimnagar district recorded one of the highest number of surgeries related to delivery and most of them are carried out in private nursing homes. Greed of Gyneacologists was suspected to be the major reason for majority of them.Is it not inhuman? Mahatma Gandhi writes sorrowfully in his autobiography about five legged cows of Benaras. In his childhood he used to see and enjoy them.But when he came to understand later that they were not natural, but the result of artificial transplantation of a leg of a calf after killing, he was very upset. But this was being done by poor people,whereas unnecessary surgeries are carried out by greedy people.
When I distributed sweets at the time of my second daughter's birth, my boss at that time, a very intellectual and effluent by Indian standards remarked- in his own words: '' you are the second person to distribute sweets on daughter's birth,I being the first''. This shows his feeling towards daughters. So it is not surprising that female foeticide, gender identification and declining sex ratios are the major problems in financially developed states like Punjab and Haryana.There is a saying in Telugu "An illiterate washerman is better than a learned scholar”.
Alvin Toffler predicts in his popular book Future Shock that designer babies will be a reality, if not already existing. Restrictions on Human cloning research in many countries may be putting brakes temporarily, but cannot prevent it much longer.Then , is it right to have one's choice in this or can we have a right choice? All may opt for boys in India and girls have to be imported. Many may opt for IITs, IIMs, IASs, and etc.and there will be dearth of people of other professions.So having your own choice is sometimes catastrophic.
While writing this I came across another fact in newspapers to ponder over. Breast Feeding rate in India is only 44%, the least among the South Asian Nations. Given the choice babies will think twice for taking birth in India.
My daughter passed her 10th class examination in CBSE stream with a grade of 9.8. I was not surprised when she innocently asked me whether she would be having any choice of studying further without opting for physics as a subject. She honestly told me that she was not inclined to study Physics. Almost all her friends opted for either engineering or medical stream. My colleagues and family friends were also curious to know whether she was opting maths or science as her subjects, as if these were only two options. I advised her not to study any course without interest and learning should always be associated with enthusiasm and not fear. She took a wise decision and opted for Commerce Stream. Then many people tried to console her that all children are not equally bright and there are good opportunities for Commerce students also. With this type of attitude the country can produce teachers, lawyers, accountants, writers and economists etc of only mediocre quality to the detriment of nation's future.
Children should be encouraged to pursue the careers of their own choice and wishes of parents should not be thrust upon. At the same time, it is the duty of every child to satisfy the legitimate aspirations of the parents and understand their limitations, before trying to do any work of their choice. Legitimacy should take precedence over Legality.
Pick and choose is not easy and there is no guarantee that we can choose always in our best interest. Former President Abdul Kalam dreamt of becoming pilot in his college days. After finishing aeronautical engineering from Madras he appeared for Indaian Air Force selection test. He finished tenth and only first nine were selected. Disappointed Kalam not knowing what to do went to Sivananda ashram in Haridwar. After knowing the reason for his unhappiness, Swamiji consoled him with these words. “God might have something big in store for you. That may be the reason for you not getting selected. Who knows, One day you may make aircraft and conquer the space”. Rest is history and known to all of us. He went on to become a space scientist, missile man, scientific adviser,President of India,Bharat Ratna above all a great teacher,mentor,guide,philosopher and a role model for modern India.
